Daily affirmation.

Whatever you are about to do... stop. Turn around. Go away. This is useless. Pointless. Usepointless even. Why don't you get some real writing done tonight and work on furthering your career? No, sir, a blog does not "advance the ball forward like a two yard run by the fullback." Blogs will not lead to success. No "Sports Guy" Bill Simmons doesn't count. Noooo.... he does not count. Well, OK, a little bit... but he worked hard. You don't work hard... you're lazy and easily distracted by things like Fantasy Baseball, that video game, and this repeat episode of Storm Chasers... heeeeeyyyy a Super Cell is forming. Deploy the pods, scout team. DEPLOY THE PODS!! Back to the blog, back to the blog.

What? You're writing this blog to shake loose the cobwebs that have set in after a lot of creative inactivity and TWO moves in less than one month? (House to Condo to Two closets connected by common walls) Sure. Whatever. Neat idea, kid. We both know that the second you finish this you're going to go lay down and turn on the (PlayStation 3, Facebook, PlayStation 2) and drift away. Yeah, yeah... I get it. Another long day at the day job. The thing that's not supposed to matter nor keep you from your goals while it provides medical insurance and enough scratch to buy re-issued G.I. Joe action figures. Yeah. Sure. Drift away and start tomorrow. Tomorrow's good. Tomorrow's been coming for ten years, but good idea. Remember when you were a kid? Remember when you'd come home from school... which could be harder than work what with all the homework, social anxiety, and square dance lessons during 9th grade Physical Education classes... and you'd still find time to tape a radio show in your bedroom? You tapped that show with a clock radio and boom box. Now you can go to Best Buy (but not Circuit City) and buy the tools you need to make/ tape/ shoot/ edit/post a show. Do you do it? No. You sit and watch TMZ for the fifth time pretending not to like it. ("I'm a lawyer!")

Why don't you get back into stand-up, you hump?!?! You were just starting to get interesting when you hung it up... the same way you hung up the sketch comedy spikes and the radio spikes. I sense a pattern here: methinks you enjoy walking away from things instead of working hard on things that might lead to success. Oh, also, you like the ego boost you get from walking away from things and having people plead with you to come back to it because you were good. (Key word: were.) That makes you sick... or an idiot... or both. Yeah. Probably both.

So, yeah, keep writing this pointless blog. Add it to the pile of generally useless blogs that you crap out every few months. (Remember when it was weeks? Days? You even fail at failure.) What ever you do... don't make it worth while.